Thank goodness I don't drive.

Maybe I need anger management classes.

And my nails have suffered. I have a couple of nails bitten so short, they are bleeding. I won't be able to wash my hands without grimacing for a day or two. The rest are ragged at the edges and peeling.

As it is, my sentences are all so complex and so over the top that it is difficult to understand me. That I suppose this is what happens when you are on the brink of "losing it".

I digress.

There are still aggravations online anyway. Ordinarily I love these aggravations for the sheer entertainment they bring me. I delight in their sordidness. Sometimes I would even indulge in a few sneers or raised eyebrows in sheer disbelief at how supercilious people can be. And maybe shake my head in mock sorrow at the incredible amount of egoistic junk that is clogging up the internet's arteries. These blogs are shockingly atrocious, either in style or content. But entertaining. Like Kill Bill without the artistry.

But today they just irk me. The narcissistic indulgence does not amuse me today.

I have dissected the need for self-gratification and the collective of the personal that is the generalised cultural ambry called the blog. So have thousands of others, far more eloquent than I am. I am not going to reiterate any of those expostulations.

Now, before I offend the people whom I do read and value for their content and style because they have something invaluable to offer: comfort and appreciation of the human race and life, sheer genius, beautiful prose and poetry, amelioration of my homesickness, shared understanding etc; these blogs exemplify the human vanity at its worse.

Conversely, I shouldn't judge, but right now it is so hard not to. I am grinding my teeth as I type this.

As a reader, I appreciate it when someone offers their life up for the rapacious consumption of the public. However, I do detest it when I am being manipulated excessively for their own enjoyment. I understand that a blog is personal and that a person has the right to write what they wish. Understandably, if I don't like their content, I should leave.

Now I am not so vicious as to excoriate the personal lives of others and leave visible traces of my displeasure in their guestbooks. However, I do feel extremely angered when I come across a blog that blatantly manipulates the truth. This is extremely crushing for me, because I have been lied to. More devastatingly, I have previously empathised with the outright liar.

Having discovered the truth, I do frequent these blogs simply because of the sheer perversity of it. But today, I am not so tolerant. So I am ranting about it.

So how does one know when one is being lied to? Style and content. I won't name names here, or allow these poor benighted souls (god, my contempt does come through in my writing) to be jeered at like some bad circus sideshow. But it is very obvious when one is blatantly lying. For example, I know for a fact that the university you attend does not award research scholarships to first years who are international full-fee paying students. More amazingly, a scholarship in the humanities to someone with your atrocious spelling, grammar and vocabulary. And to think I once admired you for your intelligence and conscientiousness. I commiserated with you over your failed relationships. I was in awe and envious of your popularity with men. Now everything you write is tainted with dishonesty. I have to disregard everything you write. Even if the rest are true.

I guess what I am really annoyed at is my own gullibility and foolishness.

But it goes to show how quickly everything turns to dust if you are caught in one lie. Just one lie. And everything else you built comes to nought.

The other blog that really annoys me today is just perversely entertaining. I usually enjoy her forthright opinions, even if I occasionally disagree with them. Sometimes her disgruntlements and pet peeves alienate me, because they are so different from mine, but it is always interesting to learn more about human nature. However, today I just felt like seizing her by the neck and wringing it in an effort to convey to her the gratuitousness of her opinions. My "dear girl", if the guy you have a crush on does not reciprocrate your feelings, and compounds his error further with the bad taste to like another girl, that does not necessarily make the other girl a slut, a prostitute, or a whore. It is highly possible that she offers him something else besides sexual favours. Like docility.

There are lessons to be learnt here. I know. That is why I read her blog.

Hmmm. I am feeling really calm now after this rant. I guess it was cathartic. I can't believe I spent two hours on this entry.

In conclusion, to end on a slightly more upbeat note, this is human nature. Nice to know that I am as imperfect as the rest of the world. The last, was a statement made in jest. Take it whichever way you wish. The disgruntled reader may have my gracious permission to rant and rave about my failings as an egoistic freak, but please, don't link me if you do. Honestly. I won't like the controversy or the hits I get because of it.