Another selection from the delectable soundtrack of O' Brother Where Art Thou.

Last night, I watched it for the fourth time. I adore the dialogue, the Southern dialect, the Homerian references and of course the music. Everything about the movie touches some chord in me. The funny bone, the literary whore and the uneducated musical ear.

And I kid you not, Ulysses Everett McGill actually reminds me of a female friend. They both speak the same way.

I have noticed that many of the songs echo what I am going through right now.

When I started devouring the soundtrack, I went straight for the hymn sung by the blissful Baptist Choir. Soothing, melodic which suited me just fine. I was after all happy and content. It had the added advantage of reminding me of one of the funniest moments in the film. "Gopher anyone?"

But recently it has been the darker songs that have caught my fleeting fancy. I am not pulling your leg when I said I empathised with the male singer of You Are My Sunshine. BF.

So what with all this babbling about songs? It is the similar in content to that entry I wrote about stories touching a chord deep within you.

I re-read the entire series of Star of the Guardians in a day. And I would have re-read Gone With The Wind had I decided that I wasn't helping my mood much by reading stories about love that goes awry either through destiny, mis-timed events, misunderstandings and just plain bad luck. Oh and don't forget the stupid woman who yearns after an ideal which she will never understand. And who does not realise the human element involved in life.

Yes, the notion of love and sacrifice weighs heavily on my mind these days. I have been making the rather bitter and macabre joke about BF and my dad. The extended version runs like this:

"You know how a girl always has to choose between two men at some point in her life? It's usually two hot hunks with equal attributes *wink wink*. Well in my case, it is a middle aged man and a ultra cute computer geek."

Yes, you know who I choose at this point in time. Hahaha. But no one's laughing.

The ironic thing is that my mom is encouraging me to think about the whole thing and go for it. She says that maybe I could go with the BF after I have worked for a couple of years. And this is the person who has been warning me off with, "Men are sweetest when they are courting." "Your BF has bad taste in presents." "Just one rose?"

Of course she takes into account that situations change and permutations multiply with time. She is right.

Panther has decided to throw in an additional wrench into the already chaotic mess that was once my pretty clockwork life. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever get a male friendship which is truly platonic, at least after the initial chemistry dies out.

But yes, I am fudging somewhat on that.

Whatever. I just want my old life back. BF rolling his eyes at the other end of the phone line and me whining about some trivial thing. Or him sucking my nose because I am "Short stuff", or checking to see whether my head is ripe by messing my hair up. And both of us carefree.

I am weary of thinking and cataloguing. Let me rest.