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The Dentist Sept. 28, 2003 ] 7:56 PM He looms over me God on a stick Paid by the hour. Featureless cyclops With an all knowing eye And a death grin I know is there. The vision changes As the room upheaves itself Powered by his power A quick shuttering of the eye One moment, I am blinded, The next discarded, unseen. His attention sporadiac But fixated on his whim. Blinded, bound, effectively gagged, I am, Thrall to his quiet mumbling chants, Spelling the panicked, Faceless words without a meaning, To the impoverished, the benighted and the illiterate. I want to punish him, Break him into little bits Like he breaks me With the harsh whirr That trundles deep Beyond bone and flesh Held together only by skin, Skin deep. He enunciates my sins Enumerates each of them. Savouring each word. Irregular, illogical whimsies. Excoriates all my natural pleasures Unworthy of his labour. My teeth are bared, In anger, in fright, it matters not, They are useless, Denatured, defiled. I wish to speak. But I cannot cry out. Only grunt in glottal gutturals. What utterances cannot make mouths? Only birth lips that bleed Stuttering out precious blood With each beat of the heart. How quaint, That word, heart, Replaceable, paradoxically irreplaceable, A synonym, fashioned like some sweet valentine A monument that appears In silly girly poems In nectar, in candy, in chocolate truffles As love. There, There's that signifier again, To dictate to the unlearned. Love. Irreplaceable, refutable. An old mothering whore Whose milk dried out, Just one letter short of suffocation. Thus she sucks me dry, Rots me to condemn me instead: Sentenced to be bound and gagged At his mercy, In his chair. My pain, Can you, tenderless demon, So far removed, Capped, gowned and masked, Feel it? I cannot speak. I can only cry. wax ] wane